Who is the source of authority on this issue, and do you have that person or group’s approval?.By when does it need to be accomplished?.What is the deliverable being requested? Be specific.What is today’s date and time? (This will help you track how the project evolves.).The memo should cover the following questions: Essentially, you’re helping the asker fine-tune the request into a proposal. Think of the intake memos that lawyers, accountants, and doctors write-documents created for their own reference to capture the particulars of each client’s need. You should ask questions and take notes, clarifying every aspect of the request, including the costs and benefits. It simply signals that you’re taking your counterparts’ needs seriously, whether you can help or not. It doesn’t mean you’re agreeing to the ask. You can develop a reputation for being highly responsive if you engage in this way. That’s why you ought to help yourself and the asker by getting critical details about the request. Sometimes the ask is sloppy, so you misunderstand: It sounds like more or less than it is, or it sends you off in the wrong direction. That starts with insisting on a well-defined ask. When you say yes or no to a request, you’re deciding where to invest your personal resources, so give the choice the same careful consideration. When making a financial investment, most of us do some due diligence-seeking out more information so that we can make a sound judgment. It has three parts: assess the ask, deliver a well-reasoned no, and give a yes that sets you up for success. How do you do it? Through decades of research into what makes people the most highly valued, indispensable employees at hundreds of organizations, I have uncovered a framework that I believe works. You want to gain a reputation for saying no at the right times for the right reasons and make every single yes really count. The right yes allows you to serve others, make a difference, collaborate successfully, and increase your influence. You must therefore learn when and how to say both no and yes. Still, no one wants to anger or disappoint colleagues or other contacts-or, worse, turn down key career and life opportunities. When you take on too many or the wrong things, you waste time, energy, and money and distract yourself from what’s really important. You can’t say yes to everyone and everything and do all of it well. And now more than ever, your professional success and personal well-being depend on how you manage it. The requests keep coming-across tables and through zoom screens, by phone, e-mail, and instant message. Add to this the demands of external stakeholders, of family, friends, and acquaintances, and sometimes even of complete strangers. They’re not just from direct bosses and teammates but also from “internal customers” all over the organizational chart. The asks are formal and informal, large and small. All day every day, most of us are fielding requests. If you become skilled at conveying both, you can avoid burnout, increase your influence, and enhance your reputation.Įver since companies started working more cross-functionally and collaboratively, exchanging top-down management for dotted-line reporting with fuzzy accountability, work has gotten more complicated. A good yes allows you to serve others, add value, and collaborate effectively. If the answer is yes, make it an effective one by explaining how you think you can help, pinning down the deliverables, and laying out a focused plan for execution.Ī considered no protects you. Moreover, it’s communicated in a way that makes the asker feel respected. A good no is all about timing and logic-it’s in order whenever things are not allowed, cannot be done, or should not be done. If you do have to turn someone down, deliver a well-reasoned no. First, assess each ask, systematically gathering the details that will allow you to make an informed judgment. Tulgan, who spent decades studying what makes people the most highly valued, indispensable employees at organizations, presents a three-part framework for managing the flood of requests. So it’s crucial to learn when to say no and how to say both no and yes. The inflow is so great, you can’t possibly agree to everything. The asks are formal and informal, large and small, and from all across the organization. If you’re like most people, you’re constantly fielding requests at work.
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